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  ‘I’ll take the whole outfit,’ she said briskly. ‘Something in pink would be nice, too.’

  ‘I don’t believe this.’ Jason put down his last load of purchases and shook his head slowly.

  Up until yesterday this living room had been a place of refuge. Sure, the empty beer bottles tended to accumulate on the coffee-table and an unwashed plate or two might mean a less than straight passageway to the couch, but it had never bothered the men who lived there. There had been a lot of good times in this room, chilling out with some good conversation and a game of cards or winding up into a fervour of support as they watched a rugby match on television. Those good times were unimaginable right now. The living room looked as though it had become a suburban outlet for the Baby Warehouse.

  ‘Look at all this stuff. We can’t possibly need it all.’

  ‘We certainly didn’t need a whole trolley load of toys,’ Laura agreed.

  ‘And have you any idea how much it all cost?’ Jason felt yet another echo of the shock wave the checkout girl’s request had evoked, but at least the pain was starting to fade just a little. ‘I had no idea babies could be so expensive. I’ve spent more on her clothes in one hour than I’ve spent on myself in the last year!’

  Laura thought it might be advisable not to go into the cost of the clothing too closely. ‘The bassinet was a good choice. I love the little farm animals on the ruffle.’

  Jason made a low growling sound. ‘She wanted me to buy a cot, would you believe? One with an adjustable mattress level that you keep putting down. Then it turns into a bed. I nearly told her we were only planning to keep the kid for a few days, not a few years.’ His gaze roved over the supplies of nappies, bottles, feed and sterilising materials and the bedding, plastic bath and containers of lotion and wipes. The toys. The clothing. And yet more toys.

  ‘I must have been mad,’ he said sadly.

  ‘Think of it as child support,’ Laura said helpfully.

  Jason scowled at the faintly acerbic tone. ‘I’m paid up till she starts university in that case.’ He watched as Laura continued her journey around the perimeter of the room, jiggling the baby, who hadn’t stopped crying for more than thirty seconds at a time since they’d left the shop. The sound was really beginning to grate on raw nerve endings and Jason gritted his teeth.

  No wonder Laura sounded less than sympathetic. She’d had the noise at close range while he’d spent the last half-hour unloading and arranging their purchases. She looked tired, too, and Jason experienced a moment of panic at the thought she might decide to throw in the towel and go home.

  ‘Here…let me have a go at shutting her up.’ The appreciative smile he received made the offer well worth while.

  ‘Thanks.’ Laura transferred Megan to his outstretched arms. ‘I could use a break.’

  ‘Put your feet up,’ Jason said generously. ‘Have a nap even.’

  ‘What I really need is a nice long shower. My hair feels like old string.’ The grimace that accompanied the tug on the ponytail made Jason look at Laura’s hair consciously for the first time, and she was right. It looked like old string. Her glasses had smears on them and the baggy T-shirt she wore had a lot more than just smears. All in all, it wasn’t an attractive package, but Jason couldn’t have cared less what his new housemate looked like. He needed her. Big time.

  No way could he face this alone and his best mates hadn’t exactly lined up to assist, had they? Mitch had only stayed as long as it had taken to pack half his gear last night and Stick had dropped in with him to collect his CD player.

  ‘It’s a great sleep-out,’ he’d informed Jason unmercifully. ‘Quiet as. And Cliff’s quite happy to have us stay as long as we want. He’s been thinking of renting it out anyway.’

  Fifteen minutes later, Jason’s appreciation of Laura’s efforts was waning. Just how long did it take to have a shower and wash hair? He was in trouble here. Megan’s face was bright red from the effort of yelling so loudly and nothing he did seemed to make any difference. He’d tried putting her in the brand-new bassinet but she hadn’t been impressed.

  ‘Have you any idea what this thing cost?’ Jason queried. ‘We paid extra for those cute little sheep and pigs. You’re supposed to like them. Here…look at this.’ He picked up the soft toy jack-in-the-box and squeezed the base. The maniacally happy-looking jester flew out at close range to Megan’s face. Incredibly, her howling notched up several more decibels.

  Jason threw a guilty glance over his shoulder, half expecting Laura to appear and berate him for his total inadequacy in entertaining a baby. No…he was hoping she’d appear. He wouldn’t mind being berated if he got rescued at the same time. Awkwardly, he picked up the infant again, remembering to put his hand under its head for support. Good grief, it was so tiny. The little head fitted into the palm of his hand and felt no bigger than a grapefruit. And it was hot, he noticed. Hardly surprising, with all that energy being expended making noise. A waft of an odour he was unfortunately becoming all too familiar with caught Jason’s nostrils and he rocked the baby in his arms and stared miserably at the door.

  ‘Come on, Laura, for God’s sake,’ he muttered. ‘I need you, dammit.’

  Jason looked almost as miserable as Megan sounded, Laura decided when she entered the room a few minutes later. Feeling clean and refreshed after her shower, her stress levels had declined enough for the sight to be almost amusing.

  ‘At least it’s only Megan that’s howling,’ she said.

  ‘That’s not funny.’ Jason scowled. ‘You’ve no idea how close I am. There’s something wrong with this kid. Unless it’s just because it hates me.’

  ‘Let’s try changing her nappy,’ Laura suggested. ‘That might help.’ Deftly twisting her damp hair into a ponytail and securing it with a scrunchy, she then spread a towel on the floor and reached for the packet of baby wipes. ‘You know, those change tables looked great. Much easier on the back to do this standing up.’

  Jason deposited his shrieking bundle onto the towel with surprising gentleness. ‘Hardly something you could pack up and take back to England,’ he reminded her. ‘We had to draw the line somewhere.’

  ‘The bassinet isn’t exactly portable either.’

  ‘Yeah…well, I did suggest using the cardboard box if you remember.’

  ‘Oh, I remember.’ Laura chuckled as she eased Megan’s legs from the stretchsuit and pulled at the nappy’s plastic tags. ‘I’m sure that sales assistant won’t forget in a hurry either.’

  Jason went a noticeable shade paler as Laura opened the nappy. ‘I’m sure you need a coffee,’ he said hurriedly. ‘And I’d better mix up another bottle, hadn’t I?’

  ‘Mmm.’ At least he’d stayed within six feet while the nappy had come off. Laura found herself smiling as she held Megan’s ankles with one hand and lifted her gently to start cleaning. It was a bit like taming a wild animal, really. A little closer each time and then…bingo! She’d have him changing a nappy all by himself. It was lucky she possessed a good degree of patience. Pushing the issue would only have him diving for cover. She was getting pretty good at accomplishing this task effectively now anyway.

  ‘There you go,’ she told the baby. ‘A nice clean bottom.’ She picked her up for a cuddle. ‘Is that better, darling? No wonder you were unhappy. I’d be unhappy if I had smelly pants, too.’

  Jason cleared his throat meaningfully behind her. ‘Let’s not go there,’ he warned. ‘I’d appreciate it if you kept your smelly pants all to yourself. Here’s the bottle.’

  ‘Great.’ Laura was pleased to hear something like Jason’s usual good humour reappearing. She moved to the couch to sit down. ‘Is it the right temperature?’

  ‘I think so.’ Jason held the bottle and sprinkled a few drops of milk on the inside of his wrist. Then his teeth flashed as he grinned. ‘I’ve seen them do that on the telly.’

  ‘And?’

  ‘And what?’

  ‘Does it feel hot or cold?’

  ‘I ca
n’t feel anything.’ The grin was replaced with an anxious frown. ‘What’s it supposed to feel like?’

  ‘Nothing.’ Laura smiled reassuringly as she held out her hand. ‘If it’s body temperature, like it’s supposed to be, it won’t feel hot or cold.’ She tested it again. ‘Perfect,’ she pronounced.

  Jason beamed. ‘Cool. I’ll see if I can get the coffee perfect as well.’

  But Laura didn’t touch the coffee Jason brewed. Neither did he.

  ‘Why won’t she stop crying?’

  ‘I don’t know.’ Frustrated, Laura put the bottle down. ‘She won’t feed properly either.’ They couldn’t find a cure for the miserable, hiccuping sobs interspersed with some ear-splitting howls, and the continued failure made the tension the noise was creating escalate rapidly. ‘I think there might be something wrong.’

  ‘I told you that.’

  ‘I thought that changing and feeding her would help. They’re the first things you’re supposed to try.’

  ‘They didn’t work, though, did they?’ Jason said accusingly.

  ‘Obviously not,’ Laura snapped. ‘Thanks, Einstein.’

  ‘What do we do now, then?’

  ‘I don’t know.’

  ‘What? You must have some ideas.’

  ‘Where are your ideas?’ Laura shot back. ‘This is your baby, Jason Halliday. It’s your problem. Why am I supposed to be an expert? I’ve never had a baby and, what’s more, I don’t intend to have one until I’m with someone who’s going to be of some help as a partner.’

  ‘I didn’t intend to have a baby!’ Jason’s voice rose to something very close to a shout and Megan raised her own volume to compete. ‘Jeez, Laura. I don’t need this. I don’t even want a bloody baby.’ He turned abruptly, as though intending to walk out. ‘This is a nightmare!’

  Laura saw him stop after only a couple of steps, his fists clenched tightly by his sides, and she sighed heavily.

  ‘I could ring Mrs Mack,’ she offered more quietly. ‘She might have some ideas.’

  Jason turned. ‘But then all the guys at the station will know what it’s like here. They’ll know I’m incompetent and I can’t even babysit my own kid for a couple of days. I’ll never hear the end of it.’

  His look was beseeching enough to prompt another sigh from Laura. ‘Have you got a thermometer in the house?”

  ‘No. Why?’

  ‘She feels hot. She might be running a bit of a temperature.’

  Jason closed the space between them swiftly. ‘I thought that, too.’ He crouched down to peer at Megan. ‘She’s sick, isn’t she?’

  ‘I’m not sure. It’s not an obvious fever. She just feels a bit warmer than I would have expected.’

  ‘But you’re a medic. You know about this stuff.’

  ‘Babies are tricky. Usually, by the time we get called, either the baby is obviously sick or the parents have noticed enough to be worried, so even if the baby looks fine we still transport it to hospital.’

  ‘I’m a parent,’ Jason said. ‘And I’m worried. The kid’s all red. It’s crying all the time and it’s hot.’

  ‘It’s not a colicky cry, so it’s not likely to be tummy pain. She hasn’t been sick, she’s not coughing and she hasn’t got a runny nose. Any baby is going to go red and get hot when it’s crying this much.’

  Laura laid her hand gently on Megan’s fontanelle where it was easy to feel a pulse. She was watching the tiny chest at the same time but it was difficult to count respirations due to the hiccuping sobs. The crying was mercifully softer now. Just an ongoing sound of tired misery.

  ‘Her breathing’s fine,’ Laura reported a minute later. ‘Her heart rate is a little fast but that could also be because she’s upset.’ She shook her head. ‘What bothers me is that this is the first time she hasn’t accepted her bottle and calmed down. Did you mix the formula the same as last time?’

  ‘Of course I did. This isn’t my fault.’

  ‘It’s not my fault either.’

  They glared at each other and Laura winced at a fresh wail from Megan. This was turning to custard. So much for that little fantasy about revealing her attractive personality to Jason.

  ‘Let’s take her to a doctor,’ she suggested finally. ‘At least that way we can get her temperature checked accurately.’

  They spoke very little to each other during the time it took to find the local GP clinic in the phone book, make an appointment and get ready. They exchanged only the bare necessities of communication as they sat in a crowded waiting room full of sniffling toddlers and fragile-looking older people who stared accusingly at anyone making too much noise. They glared in Megan’s direction on a consistent basis.

  Conversation with the GP they finally saw was somewhat stilted due to the on-the-spot fabrication that Jason had agreed in advance to mind his daughter for a few days while his ex-partner had a holiday in New Zealand. It wasn’t until they were home again nearly three hours later that the tension finally evaporated.

  ‘I thought she was going to call the police and report a stolen child. I was getting sweaty palms, imagining myself being arrested.’

  ‘It’s just as well Megan is so unmistakably yours, thanks to those eyes.’

  ‘It was really embarrassing not to be able to answer any of those questions. How would I know if the pregnancy and birth were normal?’ Jason frowned. ‘I should know. Shelley should have told me.’

  ‘The doctor was great, giving her such a thorough checkup. She said she looks generally well cared for.’

  ‘If she’d been well cared for she wouldn’t have been left on a doorstep all night and she wouldn’t have an ear infection now.’

  Laura said nothing. If she told Jason that Megan had only been left outside for a matter of minutes rather than hours, she would also have to confess that the mother had been seen driving off in the company of a man and hadn’t bothered with even a backward glance at her child. The implication that she wouldn’t be in a hurry to collect her daughter in the next few days, and the prospect of a longer time with a miserable infant, would surely be enough to ensure Jason found a rapid escape route from this situation. And Laura didn’t want that. It was too early to tell whether this could work out for any of them and she wasn’t going to give up. Not yet.

  ‘And why did the doctor say it was a shame she wasn’t being breast-fed?’

  ‘Breast-feeding gives a baby more protection against bugs. Some immunity gets passed on from the mother.’

  ‘There you go, then,’ Jason said triumphantly. ‘If Shelley was a halfway decent mother she would have been breast-feeding. And she certainly wouldn’t have just dumped her kid on a doorstep.’

  ‘No.’ Laura was quite happy to agree to that.

  She looked down at the exhausted infant she was holding. The dose of paracetamol administered at the clinic had worked wonders and Megan was now too sleepy to finish her bottle. She had been dozing between short bursts of sucking but now felt like such a dead weight that Laura was sure she was sound asleep.

  Hopefully, the GP was right and Megan would be in the fifty per cent of otitis media sufferers whose pain would settle in twenty-four hours without needing antibiotics. If it was any worse tomorrow they would have to take her back, otherwise her ears would be checked in a few days’ time.

  ‘Could you put her down in the bassinet, please, Jase?’

  Jason hesitated. ‘She’ll wake up if I touch her. She’ll start screaming again and my ears are only just starting to recover.’

  ‘I don’t think she will,’ Laura said confidently. ‘She’s dead to the world. Come on, it’s time you learned how to put your daughter to bed.’

  Jason looked as rebellious as a small boy about to have a dirty face wiped but then he gave that lopsided smile that touched something deep within Laura’s heart.

  ‘OK, I’ll give it a bash. But don’t blame me if she wakes up. She hates me.’

  Gingerly, Jason picked up the floppy baby and carried her to the bassinet.


  ‘Put her on her side,’ Laura advised. ‘And then tuck the sheet over her firmly enough to make sure she doesn’t roll onto her tummy.’

  Jason was arranging the baby as though handling an unexploded bomb. ‘Why can’t she sleep on her tummy?’ he asked. ‘I do it all the time.’

  Laura pushed back the image of Jason in those pyjama pants, sprawled prone on a mattress, with tousled blond hair and a stubble-roughened chin turned to one side. ‘It’s thought to be a major factor in protection against SIDS.’

  ‘SIDS?’

  ‘Sudden infant death syndrome. Used to be called cot death.’

  Jason stared at the tiny face below him as he carefully tucked in the sheet. ‘She’s not going to die, is she?’

  ‘Of course not.’ The notion that Jason was starting to care about his child caused a wash of pleasure that was unfortunately short-lived.

  ‘Wouldn’t be a good look, would it? Handing it back to its mother if it had fallen off its perch.’ Jason grinned at Laura. ‘Be a bit hard to cover up my incompetence then, wouldn’t it?’

  ‘All new parents feel incompetent,’ Laura said quietly. ‘Babies don’t come with personalised instruction manuals. We’ve had a sharper learning curve than most, what with her unexpected arrival and her being unwell, but we’re doing OK.’

  Jason simply nodded and Laura hugged the fact he hadn’t questioned their partnership as unexpected parents for Megan. It wasn’t a lot but it was enough to be going on with and the silence in the room seemed to herald a peacefulness that bordered on contentment. Almost.

  ‘I am so hungry,’ Laura had to confess. ‘Did you notice we missed lunch?’

  ‘Now that you mention it.’ Jason looked at his watch and his eyes widened. ‘We’ve almost missed dinner as well. I can’t believe I’ve gone so long without food. I hadn’t even been thinking about it.’

  ‘You had other things to think about.’

  ‘Yeah. Did you see all those old fogies giving us the death glare in that waiting room?’

  Laura nodded, smiling.

  ‘You would have thought it was us making the noise, not our kid.’ Jason sounded affronted now.